lyin' cheatin' coffee whore
Apr. 3rd, 2009 11:43 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
theholyinnocentOur capitalist economy may be taking a nosedive lately (Will we be sorry to see it go? Buh-bye, Cappie, take Protestant work ethic with you on the way out, please, and tell socialism and welfare state to call me!) but I like to think I’m doing my part in keeping this miserable enterprise afloat by buying myself a cup of coffee everyday. Still. But not from Starbucks, nor Dunkin’ Donuts. I usually get my morning cuppa from a local café a few blocks from our home. An even better justification there for my spending: Supporting small, local businesses, right?
Well, my little THI-verse was thrown into a tizzy a couple weeks ago when another local joint opened up. And not just any joint, but a joint that brews Stumptown coffee, which, among New Yorkers of a certain finicky ilk who believe there is not a decent cuppa to be had in the entire five boroughs, is the holy grail of coffee in our fair city. (Of course, this black gold comes from Portland; whenever we can’t do something for ourselves, we simply import the best.) While I’m not that picky about coffee—who can resist a frappacino from the Evil Empire? Not me!—I gotta say about Stumptown: Damn, this shit is good.
So I have been cheating on my usual café with the New Shiny Stumptown Place. I know. I know.
The old café won’t notice me not coming in every day, I thought. They have plenty of regulars. I may go back to them during the summer, because New Shiny Stumptown Place probably won’t sell iced coffee—
And then it happened. The other morning while Mrs. THI & I walked to the subway, my hand wrapped around the environmentally safe recycled paper cup filled with a delicious Americano, we ran into the owner/manager of my old coffee place. Like a husband caught groping a chippie at a cocktail party, I grinned nervously. And said “Hi!” in a brightly alarming manner with which I never greet anyone in the morning. He smiled, returned the greeting while placing a huge, mental black X on my face, and went on his way.
Was my spouse sympathetic to embarrassing plight? No. “YOU LYIN’ CHEATIN’ COFFEE WHORE!” she chortled. “You broke the social contract!” (This said because she’d watched that episode of House recently and I guess she thinks she is Wilson to my House. Or vice versa, because she is the smart one: She had opted not to have coffee that morning, and as a result did not get caught Stump-handed.)
Aside from all of this, it does give us an excuse to sing “Stumptown coffee sure is good!” and other variants (“Stumptown coffee bad for blood pressure!”) to the tune of “Camptown Races.”
In other news,![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
angharad_gov brought to my attention that it’s National Poetry Month, so I’m planning on posting some poems during the month. I have been wanting to post some Lawrence Durrell, since I have been reading Bitter Lemons (his memoir about living in Cyprus during the 1950s), but have yet to find any of his poems that I really, really like. So perhaps Larry will get a prose-post instead. Or should I wait for National Prose Month?
Well, my little THI-verse was thrown into a tizzy a couple weeks ago when another local joint opened up. And not just any joint, but a joint that brews Stumptown coffee, which, among New Yorkers of a certain finicky ilk who believe there is not a decent cuppa to be had in the entire five boroughs, is the holy grail of coffee in our fair city. (Of course, this black gold comes from Portland; whenever we can’t do something for ourselves, we simply import the best.) While I’m not that picky about coffee—who can resist a frappacino from the Evil Empire? Not me!—I gotta say about Stumptown: Damn, this shit is good.
So I have been cheating on my usual café with the New Shiny Stumptown Place. I know. I know.
The old café won’t notice me not coming in every day, I thought. They have plenty of regulars. I may go back to them during the summer, because New Shiny Stumptown Place probably won’t sell iced coffee—
And then it happened. The other morning while Mrs. THI & I walked to the subway, my hand wrapped around the environmentally safe recycled paper cup filled with a delicious Americano, we ran into the owner/manager of my old coffee place. Like a husband caught groping a chippie at a cocktail party, I grinned nervously. And said “Hi!” in a brightly alarming manner with which I never greet anyone in the morning. He smiled, returned the greeting while placing a huge, mental black X on my face, and went on his way.
Was my spouse sympathetic to embarrassing plight? No. “YOU LYIN’ CHEATIN’ COFFEE WHORE!” she chortled. “You broke the social contract!” (This said because she’d watched that episode of House recently and I guess she thinks she is Wilson to my House. Or vice versa, because she is the smart one: She had opted not to have coffee that morning, and as a result did not get caught Stump-handed.)
Aside from all of this, it does give us an excuse to sing “Stumptown coffee sure is good!” and other variants (“Stumptown coffee bad for blood pressure!”) to the tune of “Camptown Races.”
In other news,
angharad_gov brought to my attention that it’s National Poetry Month, so I’m planning on posting some poems during the month. I have been wanting to post some Lawrence Durrell, since I have been reading Bitter Lemons (his memoir about living in Cyprus during the 1950s), but have yet to find any of his poems that I really, really like. So perhaps Larry will get a prose-post instead. Or should I wait for National Prose Month?
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no subject
Date: 2009-04-03 04:39 pm (UTC)So go enjoy your Slumptown coffee while ye may!
no subject
Date: 2009-04-08 02:01 pm (UTC)I don't know what the law is like in the U.S. either, and I live here. All I know is that my significant other likes saying "the social contract" and calling me a whore at the same time. She's so efficient!
Stump-handed-----heeheehehhhhehehheh
Date: 2009-04-03 06:13 pm (UTC)Re: Stump-handed-----heeheehehhhhehehheh
Date: 2009-04-08 02:03 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-04-03 10:13 pm (UTC)BTW- Knut and I posted an apology...
You might want to consider some kind of disguise for your new addiction... a kind of coffee-cozy, if you will. That way-- you can always say you brought it from home. If I knew how to knit, I'd make you one so stylish that Casey would turn REALLY green; green enough to match her blouse! Alas, I am craft-challenged, but maybe someone else could do it for you?
Just a thought.
Around here, it's PJ's vs. CC's. Starbucks doesn't even enter the discussion, since they only have about three stores here. But the debates on the merits of coffee can get as heated as the brew.
When we aren't drinking booze... we drink a lot of coffee!
*g*
Prose, poetry-- bring it all on! And keep the caffeine flowing.
;)
no subject
Date: 2009-04-08 02:05 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-04-08 02:18 pm (UTC)Knut says his paws are too big!
;(
no subject
Date: 2009-04-04 02:43 am (UTC)an excuse to sing “Stumptown coffee sure is good!”
Singing just about anything to the tune of "Camptown Races" has been a thing in my family for as long as I can remember.
THI's a coffee whore, doo-dah... wait. I'm not doing that!
no subject
Date: 2009-04-08 02:09 pm (UTC)Hate the sin, love the sinner!
no subject
Date: 2009-04-04 07:40 am (UTC)I dunno guys, I do really think the whole thing is just like something out of my nightmares! I used to buy muffins from a lady at the market, and then a rival store opened up across the ways but down a bit. I love her muffins, but I don't get any muffins anymore cos I'm trying to be good (come on, they are glorious, savoury, five for ten bucks, cheese and spinach, and also sweet ones, yum)... anyway... she now gives me daggers whenever I walk past cos I have decided in my mind that she thinks that I am buying them from the other store. So I have to go through that angst and still have 1. no muffins, 2. not be betraying her, and 3. did I mention, no muffins?
So... I really do feel your pain. Well... except you got the coffee... so I think we have confirmed that you are, indeed, a coffee whore. BUT in your defense, we know that the way to create a better coffee shop is to provide and support competition... so! I say that you are doing it, not in the hopes of contributing to a worsening economy by purchasing shit from shit places, but instead getting quality coffee from a sound competitor. Competition isn't the problem with the economy, stupid competition that isn't economically sound (and therefore not sustainable so also not ecologically sound on any level) is.
I never bought those muffins. I swear.
no subject
Date: 2009-04-08 02:14 pm (UTC)Nonetheless I'm glad someone feels my pain! We did go to the other place for lunch over the weekend, so that should appease them!
no subject
Date: 2009-04-04 05:15 pm (UTC)this is a great story and I love the way you told it: "YOU LYIN’ CHEATIN’ COFFEE WHORE!” hahahahaha
no subject
Date: 2009-04-08 02:10 pm (UTC)Whore lover
Date: 2009-04-04 10:23 pm (UTC)Mrs. THI
Re: Whore lover
Date: 2009-04-08 02:10 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2009-04-15 02:21 pm (UTC)We coffee whores have to stick together, doncha know.